Hi. My name is Sodapop and I’m a compulsive gambler. It’s only through the grace of God that I’m here tonight. I’m very grateful to be here. My abstinence date is 7/30/01.

The grace of God is defined (by some) to be an undeserving gift from God.  In Webster’s they define grace as the love and favor of God towards human beings.  What makes these gifts “undeserving”?  Things we do not work for?  

Most people who follow God in the Bible know that most people who are blessed in certain ways must work for those blessings.  God helps those who help themselves.  Right?

I never really paid attention to these things.  I never really paid attention to the grace I’ve been given by God.   God helped me find GA almost 7 years ago.  He has helped me learn more about myself and become more self aware of things I do and say.   He has enabled me to become a better person from the inside out.  To me, THAT is the grace of God I have been given.

I was reading a blog earlier this evening, it’s all about addiction.  I’ve been reading it for several months now and tonight was the first post about compulsive or pathological gambling I’ve seen on there.  I read that thing five times.  I’m always fascinated by the scientific studies they do and the studies that they conduct about gambling.

It’s been said (paraphrased here) that a drug addict NEVER things that the drug/substance will be the answer to all their problems.  However, a gambler will ALWAYS think that the next bet will be the one that makes them rich and will take them into their dream world.  It’s a sad thing really.  I remember several times thinking if i just hit this one jackpot or Please God, just let me hit four Aces with a kicker and I’ll go home.  I’ll stop gambling.  I promise.

I’d hit said four Aces with a kicker, and more sometimes, and sit right where I was.  Compulsively putting money into that machine.  I would compulsively feed my hard earned dollars into something that gave me a high.  I was an addict.  I am an addict.  I pray every day that I never have to go back to what I was.  I pray every day I am given the serenity, courage and wisdom to choose the right path to take that day.

Gambler’s Anonymous has given me choices and has given me the tools to build a wonderful life.  I’m in the process of that now.  Progress before perfection.  Perfection will come when I breathe my last breath and I meet my Maker with a clear conscious and be able to stand up and say “I am proud of who I have become through the grace of God.”

There but for the Grace of God go I.

Thanks for letting me share….